How fast are you? How dense?

We've Moved!

2009-01-06T10:39:00.000-08:00

We've moved our (infrequently updated) site to http://blog.howfastareyou.net/. Come on over and enjoy!

2009-01-05T18:08:00.001-08:00

Getting my blog on, new year's resolution be damned.

2008-11-26T13:46:00.001-08:00

My next tattoo: "It's gonna be the future soon...When the things that make me weak and strange get engineered away"

2008-11-21T18:50:00.001-08:00

There are people that treat the @BadKitty badly. I want to hit them. Is that wrong?

2008-10-28T11:14:00.001-07:00

I am totally intrigued by this (unfinished) game: http://ping.fm/Vx9fX The video is worth a few minutes of your time, I assure you.

2008-10-17T09:53:00.001-07:00

Terrorist zombies teenagers in Kentucky: http://ping.fm/3lKZX

2008-10-11T10:43:00.001-07:00

Camping involves far too much nature. Also, tents are not proof against 30 degree weather it turns out.

2008-10-10T18:45:00.001-07:00

Making a pit stop at Harris Ranch. It certainly *smells* like we're close to where they make the cows.

2008-10-09T16:17:00.001-07:00

Going away *with* the @BadKitty this weekend. That'll show her.

2008-10-09T15:49:00.001-07:00

Distracted by shiny things.

2008-09-30T18:10:00.001-07:00

Failure is... Creating new names for things in your technical design doc when there are perfectly cromulent names that we're already using.

2008-09-30T18:07:00.001-07:00

Success is... Putting your creative lead to sleep with your technical design doc.

2008-09-27T15:21:00.001-07:00

We're going to a Corset Fashion Show. 'C

2008-09-17T13:12:00.001-07:00

http://ping.fm/Ac8Zz People you know will be bellydancing there. And drinking Rum. Also, there will be Rum.

2008-09-17T13:10:00.001-07:00

Friday the 26th? Is that twice as unlucky as Friday the 13th? Does it work that way?

2008-09-17T13:09:00.001-07:00

This week's Tiki-Ti outing is rescheduled for next week (Friday the 26th.) I will be consuming Rum at the Ojai Pirate Faire all weekend.

2008-09-10T10:36:00.001-07:00

Balkan Beat Box. Proceed immediately to your music vendor of choice and purchase their album. You'll thank me. http://ping.fm/v64pP

2008-08-28T14:58:00.001-07:00

Jeebus is coming. He looks grumpy. http://ping.fm/4KCMD

2008-08-28T14:04:00.001-07:00

Metal Monk: http://ping.fm/CZvlE

2008-08-26T12:41:00.001-07:00

I really need to go see this show: http://ping.fm/LMGD3 You can go too, but not until I've bought everything I want.

2008-08-26T11:55:00.001-07:00

So sly: http://ping.fm/nqwMG

2008-08-18T11:57:00.001-07:00

And the award for this week's best use of crowd-sourcing goes to "Amazing but True Cat Stories": http://ping.fm/3Qp50

2008-08-15T23:39:00.000-07:00

You Are Here: X

2008-08-13T13:26:00.001-07:00

wondering where I am...

Escape from Cube Hell

2006-09-02T08:23:00.000-07:00

<rant> Cubes. The Cube Farm. Soul-sucking, life-diminishing, stimuli-deadening cubicles. I just wanted to go on record saying how much I loathe them.

(begin Dr. McCoy voice) Dammit, we're human BE-ings, Jim! (end)

I am fortunate enough to have received word from some incredibly nice people that I have been released from Cube Hell and will soon be able to have one-two-three-four-five senses working overtime for good, and not for evil.

I am *so* happy. </rant>

This season's catch phrase: "abundance of sensitivity"

2006-08-25T15:07:00.000-07:00

You've probably heard all about this, but here's a little recap:

RIAA files suit against guy for infringement
Guys dies
Upon learning that guy is dead, RIAA files motion to stay the case for 60 days to allow dead guy's family to grieve, after which they will pursue suit against dead guy's family
Story hits the blogosphere
RIAA spokesdroid tells Cory Doctorow that the RIAA — "out of an abundance of sensitivity" — has elected to drop the suit

Conclusion: the RIAA is staffed by douche bags

Mr. Doctorow also asked the spokesdriod:

Where was the "abundance of sensitivity" when the RIAA failed to initially drop its case against the Scantleberry family following the death of the named defendant in the case? Given that this "abundance" only materialized within 24 hours of this story hitting several large news outlets and blogs isn't it fair to say that the RIAA is demonstrating sensitivity to its public image, and not its sensitivity to the Scantleberry family?

Oddly, spokesdroid had no comment. He probaly had to go rough up a 15-year old girl or something.

Via EFF.

EFF: Fighting for Bloggers' Rights

2006-08-24T12:08:00.000-07:00

By the way, if you're a blogger, you have rights, and the EFF wants you to know about them. Check out their resource page, which includes tidbits like a Legal Guide for Bloggers and How to Blog Safely (About Work or Anything Else).

They're fighting for your rights, too. Support 'em.

One Thing Threepio Can't Do

2006-08-24T10:10:00.000-07:00

I mean, really. Who doesn't need this?

Ding Dong, Tower Is Dead

2006-08-24T09:38:00.000-07:00

Tower Records is dead. Chapter 11, the business dirt nap. Quite frankly, I'm wondering what took so long. The obvious answer is: The American public finally wised up. After years of paying 19 friggin', hard-earned dollars for each shiny, plastic disc, they finally stopped. Now, Tower is paying the Jethro Tull piper for its sins of avarice and greed.

Yes, the recording industry is whining about illegal downloading, file sharing and piracy (by honest Buccaneer-Americans), but they also have only themselves to blame. Just like Congress, old white guys in suits tried to keep the gravy train rolling. The problem is, people weren't coming to the station anymore. They found that bicycles were faster, and... well, let's stop beating that metaphor into the ground.

The point is, many of us wised up and realized that when you buy something, you own it, and can share it at will. You can let a friend use your car, your computer, your phone... why not your digital music files?

Now, if we can just stop the RIAA from suing dead people's families.

RIAA Annual Meeting

2006-08-23T22:51:00.000-07:00

RIAA Annual Meeting A little gift for That Bald Guy.

Men can multitask

2006-08-23T10:25:00.000-07:00

Thanks HMO!

Horror these days is teh suck

2006-08-23T09:58:00.000-07:00

Charlie Stross went on vacation recently, read some pulpy books, and when he got back, posted a bit about the state of the SF and horror genres, and what their respective best-sellers say about the state of the reading public.

For starters, the strange rebirth of the horror field is quite illuminating. We used to know what horror was about — it was about Killer Whelks menacing a quiet English seaside town, from which a strong-jawed but quiet fellow and a not-totally-pathetic female lead might eventually hope to escape with the aid of a stout two-by-four and a lot of whelkish squelching after trials, tribulations, and gruesome scenes of seafood-induced cannibalism. Then Stephen King came along and transcended, becoming a mini-genre of his own. Attempts were made to replicate the phenomenon, but instead the bottom dropped out of the market.

The new horror isn't about whelks, killer or otherwise: it's about vampires, werewolves, and middle America. With police and detectives. Hell, you could even call it cop/vampire slash and have done with it, except that you'd be missing out on the tedious Manichean dualist drivel into which all these series eventually descend (unless they end up as soft porn instead — a very lucrative market, as Laurel Hamilton and her imitators have discovered — call it the fang-fucker subgenre). For the sad fact is, there seems to be some kind of law about contemporary American horror getting into furry sex by volume three then suffering a fit of remorse and going all god-bothering and Jesus-fondling by volume six. It must be all the crosses and holy water they need to fend off the blood sucking fiends, I suppose, but the endless re-hashing of tired old religious-sexual neuroses is getting to be a stereotype of the genre, and it's not healthy. Horror isn't about being born-again: it's about bloody screaming catharsis, not a warm security blanket of belief that blocks out all menaces. But in the new horror, if the bloodsuckers are remotely sympathetic the story turns into some kind of supernatural redemption epic, and if they're not, the protagonist eventually goes all googly-eyed and born-again.

What an interesting &mdash and frankly, sad &mdash point. And I can't say I disagree with him. But what do you expect from American culture? We use sex to sell everything, then tell people that sex is a sin against God and nature.

He also draws some conclusions from the rise of the alternate history sub-genre of SF:

Probably the fastest-growing sub-genre in the swamp is alternate history. I've been known to dabble in it myself, I hasten to admit: it can be fun and educational, a desert topping and a floor wax. But mostly floor wax these days, I find, because a lot of authors who should know better are turning to it in a mad collective ostrich-head-burying exercise rather than engaging with the world as it is.

Yeah, that's pretty much dead on. Americans don't want to think about the here-and-now, 'cause it sucks. Between Dubya, bombs in our Gatorade and our iPods, a costly and perhaps illegal war, constant reminders of the "threat" of terrorism, the NSA spying on our fellow citizens, oil dependency, poverty, pending thermonuclear war with Iraq, pending war with/between everyone in the middle east, the end of the world as predicted by the Aztec calendar or whatever, etc., etc., ad nauseam, people want to escape. Fans of alt-history must find a great deal of solace in a revised world similar to our own. It doesn't require a lot of thinking or the absorption of new ideas, just a different flavor of today. How nice. No wonder it sells so well.

But all is not lost.

Oh, there are exceptions. Vernor Vinge is swimming strongly against the flow in "Rainbows End", where he envisages a future just a couple of decades hence where the machines dance. Peter Watts is doing stuff with the genre that just shouldn't be possible (evolutionary biology, exobiology, and vampires in spaaaaaace — all done with a deft touch of plausibility and a refreshingly pleasant dose of bleakly nihilistic existential despair). And there are a few others.

In closing, let me point you to one of the others: Chris Nakashima-Brown. He's got links to a bunch of his short-stories on the intertubes and in print, one of my favorites being Welcome Back Qatar. Good, smart, reality-based stuff.

SoaP: Putting the Fanatic back in Fan

2006-08-23T09:55:00.000-07:00

Fella name a' Doz (aka iBgerd) is clearly the #1 Snakes on a Plane Fan[atic], and clearly deserves some kind of prize.

Boing Boing has a great round up of more SoaP meme related stuff. Follow the bouncing link.

Told ya, we'll be flying nekkid

2006-08-23T09:46:00.000-07:00

Says Cory Doctorow:

They're onto something here. If the existence of a plot to use implausible liquid explosives against aircraft creates a global war on moisture at the airports, imagine what a similar plot to smuggle a bomb up a terrorist's ass would engender. The war on moisture is bad, but it's nothing compared to the inevitable war on body cavities.

Via Boing Boing.

Movie: Brick

2006-08-22T10:28:00.000-07:00

This weekend The Bad Kitty and I watched a movie called Brick. We'd heard that it was good, but it wasn't. It was really, really good.

Imagine Philip Marlowe as a teenager today. Not the various movie versions of Philip Marlowe, but Raymond Chandler's character as written: the hard, imperfect, honorable man who did the right thing, even when it meant taking a beating himself.

Down these mean streets a man must go who is not himself mean, who is neither tarnished nor afraid. The detective must be a complete man and a common man and yet an unusual man. He must be, to use a rather weathered phrase, a man of honor. He talks as the man of his age talks, that is, with rude wit, a lively sense of the grotesque, a disgust for sham, and a contempt for pettiness.

— Raymond Chandler, The Simple Art of Murder

And clearly, the movie and it's lead character, Brendan, are a loving homage to Chandler's work. Rian Johnson (the writer/director of Brick) did a great job of updating and reproducing Marlowe's quick, smart-aleck, private dick argot. Some examples:

Brad (the BMOC): Oh yeah?
Brendan (our hero): Yeah.
Brad: Oh yeah?
Brendan: Yeah.
Brad: Yeah?
Brendan: There's a thesaurus in the library. Yeah is under "Y". Go ahead, I'll wait.

The Brain: Ask any dope rat where their junk sprang and they'll say they scraped it from that who scored it from this who bought it off so and after four or five connections the list always ends with the Pin. But I bet you got every rat in town together and said 'show your hands' if any of them've actually seen the Pin, you'd get a crowd of full pockets.

Then there's "The Pin" (played quite creepily by Lukas Haas), who refer's to Brendan as "Soldier", like Eddie Mars referring to Marlowe in The Big Sleep:

"Convenient," [Eddie] said. "The door being open. When you didn't have a key."

"Yes. How come you had a key?"

"Is that any of your business, soldier?"

"I could make it my business."

He smiled tightly and pushed his hat back on his gray hair. "And I could make your business my business."

"You wouldn't like it. The pay’s too small."

See? Good stuff. Go see Brick on DVD, and then go read some Chandler.

Journal of Ottoman Calligraphy

2006-08-22T10:27:00.000-07:00

Wouldn't it be nice if all writing looked like this?

The Journal of Ottoman Calligraphy is dedicated to Islamic art and Ottoman calligraphy and it is currently a Online journal. The JOC is a semi-academic online periodical devoted to the subject, and has been spearheading the ongoing discussion defining Islamic and Ottoman calligraphy, since its founding in 2006. JOC is a refereed online journal that publishes essays and reviews on all aspects, areas and periods of the history of Islamic and Ottoman calligraphy, from a diversity of perspectives.

Most articles are in English, with a few appearing in other European languages and in Turkish. Each volume also includes a calender of events and a list of puplications concerning Islamic and Ottoman calligraphy worldwide.

The mission of the JOC is to delight, inspire, and educate a diverse public through the collection, preservation, exhibition and interpretation of works of Islamic and Ottoman calligraphy. The JOC is a non-commercial project.

Via BibliOdyssey.

The Secret Love of Perez Prado and Spike Jones

2006-08-21T10:30:00.000-07:00

Via Coop, who also points us to some more Spike Jones clips.

Live in California? Keep RFID out of your driver's license

2006-08-17T12:21:00.000-07:00

From the EFF:

We're close to a major victory in the battle to keep radio frequency identification (RFID) tags out of California IDs, but we need your help to finish the job.

Without careful safeguards, RFIDs in IDs can broadcast your personal information to anyone nearby with cheap, readily-available equipment. Your government could be exposing you to the risk of covert tracking, stalking and identity theft.

In California, EFF has been working with a diverse range of concerned groups to stop insecure ID cards. The result, S.B. 768, faces a vote next week in the Legislature before reaching the governor. (The bill has already passed the Senate once, though not in its amended form.)

If you live in California, use our Action Center now to call your representatives and tell them to vote yes on SB 768.

Must have HD arcade cabinet

2006-08-17T11:59:00.000-07:00

I don't think I've every really considered buying an arcade cabinet before, but an arcade cabinet for your PS2 or Xbox with hi-def and kick-ass audio? I don't think I can live without one!

Although, for 3-4 grand, I can learn to live without. But the suffering without one! The suffering!

Via Gozmodo.

All your locks are belong to us

2006-08-17T11:55:00.000-07:00

Everyone who knows how locks work knows that they're really just a convenient fiction that are only good for keeping your stuff safe from the uninformed or ill-equipped. Here's further proof:

William Gibson says

2006-08-17T11:49:00.000-07:00

Silver nitrous girls pointed into occult winds of porn and destiny.

Man, that cat can write.

Savage Chickens on a Plane 2

2006-08-17T10:47:00.000-07:00

...and of course Snapes on a Plane.

You should read Savage Chickens every day!

Fly nekkid, arrive poorer

2006-08-14T14:57:00.000-07:00

As a follow-up to Mr. Lupo's post, here's today's fun travel fact: if the TSA forces you to check your laptop, camera and other expensive goodies, then the airline loses or breaks them, you are SOL. It seems that, according to international rules, airlines are only liable for £15 per kilogram for lost or damaged luggage. Worse, your own travel insurance probably doesn't cover more than £1,500 for all losses, with a cap of £400-500 per single item.

That puts the "shit" back in shit-out-of-luck.

Musicians with the Bolshoi theatre company are having a particularly prickly problem, in that a) some of their instruments are worth tens if not hundreds of thousands of dollars, and b) they are legally obligated to keep those pricey fiddles with them at all times. So they're taking the train. Just like I will next time I have to travel.

Meanwhile, after suddenly becoming a grave threat to both transportation security and the American way of life, lipstick and baby food are apparently no longer being used to make bombs, nerve gas, or whatever other FUD-based weapons the "experts" were blathering on about on the "news." [Attention "experts" and talking-heads: you are helping the terrorists by spreading terror. Knock it off. Speak calmly and rationally about the facts. Don't make stuff up to fill the airtime between commercials. Thank you.]

Via The Consumerist and Boing Boing.

Moo. Baa. The people have spoken.

2006-08-14T10:28:00.000-07:00

I don't know with whom I'm more frustrated:

The government, for preaching and peddling FUD
The FAA and TSA, for hiring completely incompetent ~~drones~~ workers
The general public, for putting up with all of it
The media, for taking the gub'ment FUD and spreading it like syphilis

In a nutshell: because of a thwarted attempt to hijack airlines, we are no longer allowed to bring liquids, books or electronics on board. No water (wait ad nauseum for a steward to bring it), no toothpaste (ew.), no books (just SkyMall, please. Consume!), no DAPs (music kills) and no laptops (because watching Captain Ron for the umpteenth time is sooo much better).

It gets worse: ~~mindless chimps~~ people are actually agreeing with authorities, spewing the usual tripe about feeling safer with more regulations and the "small price to pay" for safety.

Try this one, from Bill Brown, Harbeson, Delaware: "I agree with the UK banning all electronic devices in the cabin. These items need to be checked in and stowed in the cargo area. We can do without these items until we reach our destinations." And he's not alone.

F-ing what?! Are you serious? You'd rather place your cellphone, $2,000 laptop and PDA into the cargo hold and let the baggage apes throw it around like a dead panther cub in the wild? The utter lack of intelligence and foresight appalls me, and though I am no longer surprised, I still find myself shocked.

It's not that we're not safe; it's just a different perspective. We're just like the rest of the world, which gets on with its life and understands that things happen and crazy people blow things up. But Americans are giving up their rights left and right, telling themselves it's OK. You can sit at home and wring your hands over it, worrying that the terrorists will steal your personal data unless you let your DSL provider charge you more to send "secure and reliable" email. You can stay off planes altogether, or board them and arrive dehydrated in all your glorious bovinity, proud that you didn't let the terrorists win. You can sit and cower and obey everything the nice, white politicians tell you. And after a while, you won't have a choice to do anything except listen, because it will be law, and you'll be wondering why no one stood up to say it was wrong. No one stood up, including you.

Besides, you weren't using those civil rights anyway, were you?

RU Sirius has two podcasts

2006-08-11T11:22:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I missed this. RU Sirius has two podcasts: The RU Sirius Show (which I mentioned a couple of weeks ago) and NeoFiles. I'm not sure what the difference is between the two as far as topics are concerned as they both seem to cover a pretty broad spectrum, but they're both brimming with excellent interviews with fascinating people. RU himself is perhaps cyberpunk's most prominent real-world prophet, with a firm grokking of culture (pop, fringe and otherwise), history, drugs, technology and art.

Since I seem to be coming to the party a little late, I've been catching up with The RU Sirius Show and there's a bunch of really good stuff there. This morning I listened to a two-part interview, which I strongly recommend, with Mel Gordon, author of Voluptuous Panic: The Erotic World of Weimar Berlin and The Seven Addictions and Five Professions of Anita Berber):

» Show #48: Seven Addictions & Five Professions (MP3 link)
» Show #49: The Hipster Whores of Weimar Germany: Mel Gordon pt. 2 (MP3 link)

NeoFiles, the other podcast RU hosts, seems equally populated with interesting folks. I've only listened to one so far, an interview with author Chris Nakashima-Brown, and it's a doozie. Mr. Nakashima-Brown seems to have taken the whole cyberpunk/near-future-fiction thing to heart and is doing sterling work with it. Anyone who can write Jorge Luis Borges into a lost episode of The Love Boat deserves ~26 minutes of your time.

» NeoFiles Show #49: The New Cyberpunk SF (MP3 link)

Book: Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell

2006-08-11T11:20:00.000-07:00

I just finished Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell: A Novel by Susanna Clarke. Rarely have I enjoyed a book more than I enjoyed this one, and I encourage you to pick it up.

Our friend Miss Ivy commented that it reminded her of the The Pickwick Papers, and I have to say that that description is not entirely inaccurate. It certainly does have a Dickensian feel, dry humor, and it's spiced with anachronistic turns of phrase and spelling that serve very will to enhance the atmosphere of c.1810-1816 England.

It also totally sucked me in. There was even one memorable moment where an event in the story actually shocked me, even though I knew it was coming and, not being one of the characters in the book myself, I knew that it hadn't actually happened. That is some skillful authorship.

Go read it.

Gator[ade]s on a Plane

2006-08-10T17:21:00.000-07:00

Who indeed, Mr. Jackson? Who indeed?

I was going to post something from CNN's version of the story but I can't. The baseless and laughable speculation by "a senior congressional source" and "a U.S. counterterrorism official" etc. is just too depressing. Our nation's security is provided by people who are technically retarded. Check the link for more wacky governmental hijinx.

Via Boing Boing.

Pretty soon we'll be flying nekkid

2006-08-10T11:59:00.000-07:00

The NTY reports that British government has foiled a plot to blow up 6-10 airplanes using liquid explosives with small electronic devices as detonators.

Here in the US, the TSA has "put in place new regulations barring passengers from carrying any liquids, gels or lotions onto planes, except for milk or juice for young children and medicines."

Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said the restrictions reflected the belief of investigators that the plotters planned to bring liquids on board, "each one of which would be benign, but mixed together could be used to create a bomb."

The liquids were to be disguised as beverages and the detonators as "electronic devices or other common devices." Britain banned all cellphones and portable music players from flights.

Mr. Chertoff called the plot "a very sophisticated plan and operation" that was close to fruition. "They had accumulated the capability necessary and they were well on their way," he said at a televised news conference in Washington.

Sophisticated plans? This smacks of the kind of brilliant analysis the comes from watching the Die Hard movies, but I digress.

Liquids for children are allowed on board, as are liquid prescription medicines with the traveler's name on the bottle and non-prescription medicines like insulin. Parents were being asked to take a sip of the juice or milk to prove it is what they say it is.

Officials were requiring passengers to check everything except personal items like keys, wallets, and passports, which they had to carry in plastic bags. Drinks and other liquid items were banned.

Travelers were required to remove eyeglasses from their cases, including sunglasses, and those traveling with infants were required to taste any baby milk in front of security officials.

I understand why their government, and ours, is taking these measures: the very thought of not taking them, and having a plane blow up as a result, fills the decision makers with fear. Fear is what the terrorists want, therefore the terrorists win. But taking these measures means telling the public something about why they are being inconvenienced and hassled at the airport, which fills the public with fear. The terrorists win, but nobody dies, so the decision is a no-brainer.

However, all of the wacky security measures that the TSA has put in place in the last several years have not netted a single terrorist. Sure, they've caught senators, grandmothers and nuns, but no terrorists. The 21 people that the British arrested regarding this particular plot were not nabbed at the airport, they weren't caught by an NSA wiretap. The police got a tip from the Muslim community.

Interestingly, just last week the Cato Institute published a paper (PDF Link) that, well, here:

Even with the September 11 attacks included in the count, the number of Americans killed by international terrorism since the late 1960s (which is when the State Department began counting) is about the same as the number of Americans killed over the same period by lightning, accident-causing deer, or severe allergic reaction to peanuts.

Cory Doctorow, in his excellent post on the paper titled "Only traitors try to make us afraid of terrorists" said:

The bottom line is, terrorism doesn't kill many people. Even in Israel, you're four times more likely to die in a car wreck than as a result of a terrorist attack. In the USA, you need to be more worried about lightning strikes than terrorism. The point of terrorism is to create terror, and by cynically convincing us that our very countries are at risk from terrorism, our politicians have delivered utter victory to the terrorists: we are terrified.

Well said, that man.

The current administration has spent a great deal of time and effort to instill in the American public a pervading fear of terrorists, which to my thinking makes the administration complicit in the terrorism. Buncha dicks, all of 'em.

Via Consumerist and Boing Boing.

Technical Note: The link below is brought to you reddit's New York Times Link Generator, a nifty little tool for bloggers that will convert the URL of a NYT article to a link with a longer life than the URL.

UPDATE: More from Mr. Doctorow on today's story: British aviation bans all hand-luggage

UPDATE: Zefrank adds his two valuable cents: link

Digital Denim Denigrates Design

2006-08-10T10:22:00.000-07:00

Levi's. Apple. Brand icons the world over. But iPod jeans? It insults my geek sensibility enough to... to... well, to get my crank on over the whole thing. This is the denim version of tape on your thick, black glasses. This is like carrying a Hong Kong Fuey lunchbox in 8th grade.

Think of the tech hazard here. Parents, check those pockets before putting your kids' iPod jeans in the wash. I don't know how much Goldschlagger their designers had to down in order to come up with this, but it was obviously too much or not enough. These jeans have a built-in docking cradle, a joystick, and retractable headphones. If you're Inspector gadget on holiday, these might do the trick. Otherwise, who would wear these things? As an avid jean wearer and Apple aficionado, even I'm embarrassed by these. And, um... $200. I sh*t thee not. Oh, the horror. The horror.

Robots! Software! Mayhem!

2006-08-08T21:34:00.000-07:00

Having lived in Hoboken for a bit (East Coast, baby!), I remember much buzz surrounding the fancy new "Robo Garage". It looked liked a tall apartment building, but its classic brownstone architecture disguised the cutting-edge technology of a fully robotic garage. Pull your car in, punch in the code, and your car is whisked Matrix-like into a vast internal car farm. Need to get your car out? Punch in your code and get your car in 30 seconds. It all works fine, of course, until the city decides to renege on the software license and let a competitor in to check out the proprietary designs.

Never... never piss off developers. I mean, duuuude.

Punctuation counts, and costs

2006-08-08T17:53:00.000-07:00

Holy crap. Rogers Communications Inc. in Canada may have to pay an extra 2.13 million CAD because of one extra comma.

Language buffs take note — Page 7 of the contract states: The agreement "shall continue in force for a period of five years from the date it is made, and thereafter for successive five year terms, unless and until terminated by one year prior notice in writing by either party."

Rogers' intent in 2002 was to lock into a long-term deal of at least five years. But when regulators with the Canadian Radio-television and Telecommunications Commission (CRTC) parsed the wording, they reached another conclusion.

The validity of the contract and the millions of dollars at stake all came down to one point — the second comma in the sentence.

I'm a little over fond of comma use myself. Maybe I should brush up on its appropriate usage before I get myself into trouble.

Via Robert J. Sawyer.

I humped your hummer

2006-08-08T16:07:00.000-07:00

Hummers owners: they never go off-road, never tow anything, never haul anything around town, hardly ever have any passengers, and suck up a lot of gas in the process. Why? I mean, I'm a guy, and I like operating heavy machinery just as much as the next red-blooded American male. But I still think Hummers are just plain silly. Even the army is looking to replace them.

So this one's for you, Hummer owner. Spot yours?

The Bad Kitty has a blog!

2006-08-08T16:06:00.000-07:00

Well, OK, she's had several, and for a lot longer than I have, but still. It's exciting! Tune in for her adventures in design, knitting, jewelry, textiles, painting, and all manner of artistic and crafty pursuits. In fact, head on over right now and say hi!

Rumor has it that (if she can get your humble narrator off his butt) she'll soon have a fabulous web emporium of beautiful and hand-crafted objects that you can purchase for your very own. Very soon, I swear!

More Wicker Man? Sacrilege! And Boring!

2006-08-08T14:52:00.000-07:00

In related news, Robin Hardy, director of the 1973 version of The Wicker Man, has a lot going on too. From The Scotsman:

Scotland on Sunday can reveal that Hardy is "very committed" to bringing The Wicker Man to the theatre as a musical. The celebrated director is keeping the details close to his chest, but revealed he is already in discussions with two production companies about making his vision a reality.

But wait, there's more! The new (kinda) follow-up book to The Wicker Man!

Robin Hardy spent a month with evangelists in the southern United States in search of inspiration for his latest novel, Cowboys for Christ. In his new book, Hardy returns to The Wicker Man's themes of religion, paganism, sex and sacrifice.

...

The plot involves Beth, a gospel singer (and Britney Spears lookalike), and her cowboy boyfriend, Steve - two virgins promised to each other through "the silver ring thing" who set off from Texas to enlighten the Scottish heathens to the ways of Christ.

Meanwhile, in the Scottish Borders village of Tressock, preparations for the May Day feast get under way with Sir Lachlan Morrison, laird and chairman of Nuada Nuclear Power Station, going on the hunt for the Queen and her Laddie to fulfil a horrifying pagan fertility ritual.

Damn! It's actually a real book, with an ISBN (1905222416) and everything! Who knew that The Wicker Man would provide so much fodder for two, count 'em two! boring and long-winded posts!

The Wicker Man without Christopher Lee? Sacrilege!

2006-08-08T13:40:00.000-07:00

The Bad Kitty called from the mall saying she was looking at a poster for a remake of The Wicker Man, starring Nicolas Cage. Sacrilege says I!

Not that the original 1973 version was all that great, but it had as its villain that pillar of British cinema, that paragon of horror movie mythos, Christopher Lee! Let's see, who's playing Lord Summerisle in this new version? Um, Ellen Burstyn. As "Sister Summersisle." OK, I'll grant you, she was in The Exorcist, that's a scary movie, but she wasn't scary in it.

I'll also grant that Nicolas Cage and Edward "The Equalizer" Woodward are about on par, so we'll let that slide.

Let's see, who else can we pick on...in the original we had Britt "Trying way too hard" Ekland and Aubrey "Mr. P. R. Deltoid" Morris, and in the remake we have Kate "Coat Check Girl" Beahan and Paul "Cute Dance Boy" Becker. Two more points in favor of the original.

All in all, it looks like the original movie is the winner, but remember that it kinda sucked, except for Christpher Lee -- who you see very little of in the move, come to think of it. Maybe that's why it sucked. Also, the remake has a markedly different plot, so who knows, maybe the remake will be worth adding to the NetFlix queue. At the very bottom.

Bosskey Surfing

2006-08-08T13:30:00.000-07:00

Surf the NSFW web at work, Ms. Cubedweller, but don't get caught! workFRIENDLY is a service that will disguise any web page as a MS Word document so your pointy-haired-boss won't suspect a thing.

Via 27B Stroke 6, the best named blog ever.

Tehnical Note: Sadly, when I tried to drop their JavaScript into this post, Blogger that it "cannot be accepted". I know that they implemented a "fix" recently to prevent malicious JavaScript from being disseminated via posts or comments, but rather than being at all limited to malicious code, it seems they just block all <script> tags. Lame.

The illuminated Gogol Bordello

2006-08-07T16:33:00.000-07:00

Last weekend The Bad Kitty and I were at our friend HMO's place, watching Everything is Illuminated, when we discovered what will surely become my favorite band ever for the next several months.

The Bad Kitty and I had both been avoiding the film for fear it would be a depress-a-thon, even though we were intrigued by the trailer and what little we'd heard from people who'd actually had seen it. HMO said she'd been avoiding it too, but assured us that it was a well made, funny film with charming characters and great music. So she made us some brownies (as she is wont to do, superlative hostess that she is), popped in the DVD and off we went.

She was, of course, right. All of the characters were indeed charming and I could have watched them for a good deal longer. In fact, Liev Schreiber (this was his directorial and screenwritin' debut, dontchaknow) has made a great little film with narry a bad actor or clumsy shot in the lot. Elijah Wood's character is very bland, but he's supposed to be, so that's OK.

To my mind though, the best thing about the movie was Alex, played by Eugene Hütz. I can name several box-office-gold actors that could never had pulled off such an honest and, to my untrained eye, subtle performance. Without question he made the film.

Mr. Hütz also happens to be the front man for the Gypsy punk band Gogol Bordello, which brings us back, finally, to the subject of music. The soundtrack for the film is full of Ukrainian-rock-punk-ska fusiony goodness, including two tracks by Gogol Bordello. I can't wait to get my mitts on the soundtrack and the Gogol Bordello CD Gypsy Punks Underdog World Strike.

So, here's your to do list:

Watch Everything is Illuminated
Listen to the soundtrack
Listen to the NPR interview
Buy Gypsy Punks Underdog World Strike
Enjoy

DVD Viewing Note: Watch the deleted scenes after you've watched the movie. Most of them I think are best left deleted. They make Elijah Wood's character more interesting, but I think perhaps to the detriment of pacing and cohesion. The fantasy scene where Alex introduces himself, and the one where we see Elijah Wood through the viewpoint of the dog, are priceless.

Everybody's got snakes on the brain

2006-08-07T13:02:00.000-07:00

New Line Cinema is continuing to cash in on the Snakes on a Plane intertubes meme. They've officially extended licence to the public to create shirts and other products lampooning the movie on CafePress.com.

We here at the HFAYHD are disappointed to see this continued denigration of what we feel will prove to be a monument to cinematic excellence. For shame, New Line and CafePress. Shame!

Via Ironic Sans.

Eugene - Anarchy Capital of the U.S.

2006-08-04T17:56:00.000-07:00

The Bad Kitty and I recently took a little trip with some good friends to, among other places, Eugene Oregon. The weather was perfect, the people were friendly, and the town was clean and green. All and all, a very pleasant trip.

While hogging our hotel's free bandwidth looking for a fine dining establishment and trying to ignore the sound of the boat shop outside our window revving outboards, we discovered a wealth of fun facts about Eugene, including:

So if you're driving around in the middle of Oregon and you need a break from country-music-bible-thumping-middle-of-nowhere radio, swing by Eugene, "The World's Greatest City for the Arts and Outdoors!" And anarchy!

Houston, We Have Geeks

2006-08-04T11:15:00.000-07:00

For my money, ya just can't see enough of spacesuits in everyday settings.

What's in a name?

2006-08-03T14:20:00.000-07:00

A couple of people have asked me "WTF is up with the name of your blog?" To which I have unhelpfully replied, "Um, it's kind of a geek thing."

In truth it's more of a "cyberpunk" thing, but by the time that term entered into mainstream parlance almost twenty years ago, it had lost most of its original meaning. It was so misused and maligned by both fans and critics that I'm kind of embarrassed to use it at all any more. So I say "geek" instead.

Back when I could use the term with a straight face, cyberpunk meant SF about the real world, and about a future existence that was almost close enough to see with the naked eye. It was dystopian and gritty and brimming with new ideas.

Back then, some people – not just SF authors but academics and engineers and other thinky-people – were using cyberpunk to frame their speculation about our future as a species and society. To them, the near future was awash with smart drugs, computer-enhanced brains, DNA manipulation and artificial intelligence, all of which would change the definition of being and cognition, and give birth to the truly post-human. And it was all really, really close!

When next time I say "it's a geek thing", that's what I'm talking about.

As for the title of this blog, that's something I read in Mondo 2000 many moons ago, and it still resonates with me today. I believe it originally came from Rudy Rucker, scientist, and SF author, kind of contextualizing the term "cyberpunk" in a Mississippi Review article:

What's really good about punk is that it's fast and dense. It has lot of information. If you value information the most, then you don't care about convention. It's not "Who do you know?"; it's "How fast are you? How dense?" It's not, "Do you talk like my old friends?"; it's "Is this interesting?" So what I'm talking about with cyberpunk is something like this: literate SF that's easy to read, has a lot of information, and talks about the new thoughtforms that are coming out of the computer revolution.

It is our hope that this blog can in some small way emulate that description. We don't want to weigh you down with drek, just maybe give you something interesting to think and talk about. Like a geek.

Tiki Invasion - Saturday, Aug. 5

2006-08-03T10:27:00.000-07:00

This Saturday (Aug. 5, 2006), bring your uke' to Tiki Invasion at the Mission Tiki Drive-In in Montclair, California, long held to be the birthplace of...um...tiki things? Well, it's hot out there in the 909, that's kinda Polynesian I suppose.

Anyway, there will be a buncha bands, three movies, and a Von Franco-hosted car show.

Go forth and worship.

Via the LA Weekly.

Backward Compatible?

2006-08-02T15:25:00.000-07:00

I don't know what's going on. I hit a certain age, and now I'm lusting after old tech like Bill O'Reilly at a loofah showroom. Don't get me wrong: I'm up to speed on the new stuff. The latest G5, 39-megapixel digital camera backs, wi-fi out the wazoo... I love it all. But last weekend, I bought a manual Smith-Corona typewriter for $5, and now I'm looking for an old Mamiya C330 twin-lens reflex camera to go with my 50-year-old Speed Graphic 4x5 camera. (Thankfully, I don't look like Weegee... yet.)

What's next? A Bakelite phone with a modular jack? What's become of me? I just wanted to go to Tosche Station to pick up some power converters.

Domo Arigato, Doug Chiang

2006-08-01T21:55:00.000-07:00

I swear, I've been following this project since it started.
Doug Chiang had an amazing concept in 1993 as a result of teaching himself painting and design. The result is Robota: Reign of Machines, which has enthralled me and many others since he first started putting the ideas on the web. As a geek, I bow to his experience as Design Director on Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace, and then his work on Episode II. Big props.

In the past few years, there has been even more progress on this cerebral and engaging concept. Please check out the teaser trailers, then go to Doug's site for more on the artwork, concept and vision of a sci-fi visionary. You're welcome.

New Jon Foster book in November

2006-08-01T00:22:00.000-07:00

Jon Foster has a book coming out in October. He makes books pretty.

Via The Art Department.

My cell is on fye-yah!

2006-07-30T10:03:00.000-07:00

That message alert on your phone is not the late-night call you were waiting for, but it might be just as good (riiiight). Cellfire has launched its nationwide phone service for Cingular customers, and more carriers are on the way. Only a few businesses In Cali have bought in, but the concept is great. Sign up, download the mobile app, get coupons on your phone and redeem them by either showing it to the cashier or have them scan the bar code on your mobile screen.

It just makes sense that people can make more use of one device in even more practical ways than carrying envelopes full of dead-tree discount delivery devices. Maybe you can even beam your number to that cute checker. ("Is this the checkout line? Well, I'm checking you out. Giggity-giggity. Aw-right.")

Just relax, and let it happen.

2006-07-30T09:57:00.000-07:00

Even though I expressed my desire to grow as a more open-minded geek in the previous post, I had to share this one from Penny Arcade. Rehab is for quitters. The first taste is free.

Too soon old, too late smart

2006-07-28T22:59:00.000-07:00

Well, that's what my great aunt used to say, anyway. Sadly, it now applies to me. Forgive me, for I have sinned... and not in a good, delicious way.
I'm the Mac Guy 'round these parts. The Cultist. The guy who almost got the tattoo. But now I've seen some of the error of my ways. Read on; I'll be pentitent in short order.
The EFF has been doing wonderful, soul-affirming work against DRM. They are toiling day and night to make sure that your online and offline music purchases are yours when you pay for them, not rented or loaned or watched over like black market food lines by the KGB. Bravo, lads. Bravo.
On the other side of the clue bin was me, clicking on .99 crack in the ITMS like a happy little monkey. Ta-tick. Wee! Ta-tick. Neat!

Today, I got the point.
And from now on, no more clicking. No more endorphine doses in dollar increments. No more filling out my life's history and having it dial back to the mother ship for approval. Today, I am a free man, and it feels real good.
You can say "Duh" now, if you haven't already. So, thank you, Cory. Thank you, Bald Guy.
Hell, at this point, I just might go whole hog and install Ubuntu.

Deadly Cool Bartop

2006-07-28T19:37:00.000-07:00

I would move in to a bar with one of these:

Gizmodo says:

The iBar turns a countertop into an interactive surface, where projectors mounted underneath can display graphics on the milky, semi-transparent surface. It has an intelligent tracking system that reacts to touch, and its software follows objects and is able to illuminate them where they sit. There are all kinds of possibilities with this technology, such as playing with a virtual ball on a bar, in a game called iBar pong, or creating graphics that circle and connect objects placed on the counter.

Via Gizmodo.

Happy Little Trees

2006-07-28T19:30:00.000-07:00

Rember Bob Ross, he of the soothing voice, perfect 'fro, and above all, happy little trees? I loved that guy. He seemed to always be on some PBS station or another, and it was so relaxing to watch him do his thing while he hypnotized you with that nepenthean voice.

Turns out there's some video from his show The Joy of Painting on YouTube:

Poking around the intertubes a little more, I discovered to my dismay that Mr. Ross passed away in 1995. His legacy lives on however, though his company Bob Ross, Inc. (now run by his son, I think) and, holy crap, it says here a video game!

In March 2006, Bob Ross Inc. announced plans to license rights to develop a Bob Ross video game. AGFRAG Entertainment Group will receive the license and is planning on developing the game for PC, the Nintendo DS, and Nintendo's next-generation video game console, the Wii. The Wii was chosen because its Wii Remote is unique in its ability to sense 3D control, allowing the player to use the remote like a paintbrush, aptly suited to The Joy of Painting.

Whatever console that game comes out on, I guaran-damn-tee I'll be buying one!

Just before I posted this, I saw that there's a Marketplace report from 2003 about Bob Ross, Inc. I haven't listened to it 'cause it's in the crappy real audio format, so let me know how it is.

Via Positive Ape Index and Boing Boing.

Log your day with Quick Logger

2006-07-28T19:23:00.000-07:00

Wanna make quick notes to yourself about what you do during the day? Kind of a log thing? Lifehacker has a tidy little VB script (sorry, Mac cultists) that'll do exactly that for you.

I've updated it a tad to use my preferred date and time format (kinda Unixey), enclose the date in brackets, and separate the date/time from the description with a tab character to make it easier to import into a spreadsheet, should the need arise. (I would have posted it on the lifehacker comments, but you need an invite.)

'-----------------------------------------------------------
' QuickLogger v.0.1a
' Appends the date and a line of text to a file.
' Based on code written by Joshua Fitzgerald, 7/2005.
' Modified by Gina Trapani, 7/2006.
' Modified by thatbaldguy, 7/2006 (unauthorized).
'-----------------------------------------------------------
Option Explicit

Dim filename
filename = "C:\logs\worklog.txt"

Dim text
text = InputBox("Add to "&filename&":", "Quick Logger")
if text <> "" then
WriteToFile(text)
end if

Sub WriteToFile(text)
Dim fso
Dim textFile
Set fso = CreateObject("Scripting.FileSystemObject")
Set textFile = fso.OpenTextFile(filename, 8, True)
textFile.WriteLine "[" & DatePart("yyyy", Now) & "-" _
 & Right("0" & DatePart("m", Now), 2) & "-" _
 & Right("0" & DatePart("d", Now), 2) & " " _
 & FormatDateTime(Now, 3) & "]" & Chr(9) & text
textFile.Close
End Sub

Log on, my friend.

Hi, my name is Steve...

2006-07-28T07:06:00.000-07:00

Worth1000 has a new Photoshopping contest, Bad Ads 3. I'm only posting this because That Bald Guy called me a cultist, and... um... maybe he's right. Here's the proof. Click on "view full", 'cuz the fine print is the kicker. And, just for him, there's this one, too. I won't admit I laughed. You can't make me.

I can see your zlango

2006-07-27T20:06:00.000-07:00

Visual beings are we. Images surround us, filling our minds, cubicles and portable computing devices with indelible pictures from advertising and elsewhere. Seems that an up-and-coming group of humans in Israel has come up with Zlango, "a new, inspiring messaging platform which transforms SMS into an expressive, juicy, colorful icon-based experience." Juicy, indeed. One can see this being used in far-flung bars across Europe and beyond. Then again, I can see myself getting slapped silly in a fine drinking establishment in the U.S. as well. But, you never know.

Welcome Il Lupo!

2006-07-27T19:15:00.000-07:00

Please join me in welcoming Il Lupo to the HFAYHD! Signore Lupo brings with him wit, charm, good looks, stunning talents, a sterling sense of humor, and a breadth of geekiness unparalleled in the blogosphere.

I shall henceforth be known as "that other guy".

Time-Tested, Newton Delivers

2006-07-27T15:10:00.000-07:00

Those who know me know my ~~obsession~~ strong interest in all things Newton. OK, so, older tech holds a certain fascination with me. I have a whippin'-fast G5 at home, but I'm also bidding on an 80-year-old Underwood typewriter. Luddite? Not me, brother. I just like good tech that works. Like the Newton. Excellent handwriting recognition (it learned my chicken-like scrawl) and a fast StrongARM processor made it indispensable. With a Wi-Fi card, you can take it to your local java pusher and catch up on email and RSS feeds, too.

Oh, right, my point: Recently, CNET.co.uk pitted a 10-year-old Newton 2100 against a Microsoft Windows Origami UMPC. Newton won, baby. Long battery life, a hot sturdy body (on the Newton, silly) and an insanely low price for that amount of tech knocked out the Origamatron in Round 6.

A color screen and a new browser and the Newton will live again! Bwa-ha-ha-ha-*cough *cough. You know how I get.

Dear Noob DB Programmer: Knock it Off

2006-07-26T17:07:00.001-07:00

Tip #1: Don't name a anything "user" or "users". Those are reserved keywords in many RDBMS and application servers, so using them in your schema or code reduces transportability. Try "member" or "luser" or something.

Tip #2: Don't name a column "id". Again that's a reserved keyword for a lot of systems. See #3 below.

Tip #3: Make sure your column names are unique. The only time that the same column name should appear in more than one table is if it's a foreign key. Try prefixing your column names with the table name or a portion thereof. For example, the primary key in the "member" table could be named "memberID" or "memb_id" or even "m_id". This will make your schema much more friendly to other developers and DBAs by making the relationship between tables and columns clear at a glance (if you see "m_id" in the member table and "m_id" in the order table, it's pretty obvious how those tables are related, isn't it.)

Tip #4: Don't store dates as strings. When you do, you're basically pissing-away data or processor cycles or time or all three. All RDBMS have native date/time data types. Use them.

Tip #5: Don't store user passwords in clear text. Again, most RDBMS have bidirectional encryption built right in. Use it, and make sure you don't store the key in the database.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Writing and Reading

2006-07-26T17:07:00.000-07:00

Speaking of that whole writer > blogger > podcaster > publisher > reader relationship thingie, John Scalzi has more to say on the subject.

It seems that Robert J. Sawyer (sf author and publisher) and Evo Terra (sf commentator and podcaster) "are having a rather lengthy discussion on their Web sites about whether e-books are really a way to get one's self known as a science fiction author."

Mr. Scalzi makes an interesting point that I had kind of suspected, but not being a writer or publisher had no real way to verify, to wit: no one really knows what effect distributing one's printed work online has on the sales of that book (or other books by that author for that matter.)

If you're interested in this subject too, check out his post, and follow the links through the Sawyer/Terra conversation as well.

Site Accessibility, Says I

2006-07-26T17:06:00.001-07:00

Go to Corsair Memory's Find the Right Module page, and look at the flags in the lower right that let you change the language of the page. Corsair, get it?

Via By The Way...

Movie: Little Miss Sunshine

2006-07-26T17:06:00.000-07:00

It's a good 'un. Go see it. There's a trailer at the link below.

Art: Ron Mueck

2006-07-26T17:03:00.000-07:00

Depending on your source, Ron Mueck is a hyper-realist or photo-realist. I vote for hyper. For what it's worth, Wikipedia says:

Mueck's sculptures faithfully reproduce the minute detail of the human body, but play with scale to produce disconcertingly jarring visual images. His five metre high sculpture Boy 1999 [inset] was a feature in the Millennium Dome and later exhibited in the Venice Biennale.

Check the link for pics from a show in Russia. Quasi-NSFW.

Via Boing Boing.

This Call May be Recorded for Public Humiliation Purposes

2006-07-25T18:04:00.000-07:00

The nice people over at The Consumerist post that das T-Mobile forbids you to record your call to customer service, even though they reserve the right to record the call themselves. While it's not illegal for T-Mobile to set such a policy, I have to wonder if anyone over there actually thought it through. Doesn't such a policy amount to telling their paying customers "Sooner or later we're going to screw you, and when we do, we don't want any pesky recordings running around to prove your side of the story?"

Do companies like T-Mobile not understand that the relationship between customer and vendor is kept alive only through trust? Doesn't this kind of policy just tell the consumer that T-Mobile wants to screw them and doesn't want to get caught doing it?

Further, the relationship between, say, an individual consumer and a cellular company is a contract. A contract is an agreement between two parties to exchange something of value. In this case, the individual agrees to give money to the cellular company in exchange for cellular service. While the perceived value of the service is comprised of several factors, it especially includes the ability to call customer service if there's a problem (and, of course, for customer service to be willing and able to fix the problem.) Therefore, if customer service quality is perceived to be poor, the perceived value of the cellular service is reduced, and the individual may (and probably should) take their business elsewhere.

Note the use of the word "perceived". I'm sure someone over at T-Mobile understands that customer retention is wholly reliant on the perceived value of their service, but that person and the jerk who set the aforementioned policy don't appear to talk much.

Unintelligble rants aside, remember that it's totally legal to record your phone calls, and you don't even have to tell the other party unless they're in the same state you are, and that state happens to have such a law. From a follow-up post on The Consumerist:

It's totally legal to record conversations across state lines and you don't have to tell the company at all.

This right is granted specifically by Federal statute 18 U.S.C. Sec. 2511(2)(d).

Now, if the call center is in your state, you will have to notify them, but only if you're in one of these states: California, Connecticut, Delaware, Florida, Massachusetts, Maryland, Michigan, Montana, New Hampshire, Pennsylvania, Washington.

Mostly, calls to companies are interstate. You can secretly record to your heart's delight.

Via The Consumerist, from whom I also shamelessly swiped the Mr. T Mobile image, 'cause it's super sweet.

Please note that neither this post, nor any content on this blog constitutes a legal opinion or legal advice. I'm not an attorney, just someone who takes the hard work of others, shakes well with self-centered raving and a dash of vitriol, then pours it on an unsuspecting blogosphere.

Beautiful Bookplates

2006-07-25T18:02:00.000-07:00

That nice person over at BibliOdyssey has posted some more stunning finds from the print world, this time featuring some fine examples of "Ex Libris" bookplates, like the beautiful example above. Sie also points sir readers to a new blog called Confessions of a Bookplate Junkie, and provides links to four more bookplate resources.

Go look. They're awful pretty.

Via BibliOdyssey.

Goatse is Everywhere

2006-07-25T17:59:00.000-07:00

Mark Frauenfelder over at Boing Boing points out that, once you had Goatse seared into your ocular cavity, you see it everywhere:

After one brief look at Goatse, your brain is scarred forever. You can't help but see Goatse again and again -- in ads, photos, logos, and so on. Here are a few that have been submitted to Boing Boing this week...

And later that day: a persistence-of-vision bike spoke Goatse. I know what a certain someone is getting for their next birthday!

Via Boing Boing.

95 Theses of Geek Activism

2006-07-25T17:56:00.000-07:00

Ubergeeks of the world, unite behind these Theses!

(Although I would have picked a better word. Thesis? A hypothetical proposition, especially one put forth without proof? Sheesh. What's wrong with "proposition" or "instruction" or "commandment" or something?)

Geek activism has not taken off yet, but it should. With the gamers recognizing the need for a louder voice, EFF gaining momentum and Linux taking on the mainstream on the one hand and recent severe losses in privacy, freedom of speech and intellectual property rights on the other, now seems to be the best time to rally around the cause.

Geeks are not known to be political or highly vocal (outside of our own circles)- this must change if we want things to improve. So here is my list of things people of all shapes, sizes and sides of the debate need to know. Some of these are obvious, others may not be meant for you. But hopefully, some of these will inspire you to do the right thing and others will help you frame the next discussion, debate or argument you have on these topics.

I've got my EFF "SWAT" Hat on, how about you?

Via Boing Boing.

Pay Continuous Partial Attention to This Wiki

2006-07-25T17:54:00.000-07:00

Cory Doctorow over at Boing Boing says:

Linda Stone -- a superconnector of great insight -- coined the term "Continuous Partial Attention" to describe a new phenomenon, distinct from multitasking. It's the attempt to stay involved in as many connections and networks at once as possible, and it can be nerve-wracking, though the temptation to indulge in powerful. Now Linda's started a wiki devoted to the subject.

From the introduction of said wiki:

What is continuous partial attention?

Continuous partial attention describes how many of us use our attention today. It is different from multi-tasking. The two are differentiated by the impulse that motivates them. When we multi-task, we are motivated by a desire to be more productive and more efficient. We're often doing things that are automatic, that require very little cognitive processing. We give the same priority to much of what we do when we multi-task -- we file and copy papers, talk on the phone, eat lunch -- we get as many things done at one time as we possibly can in order to make more time for ourselves and in order to be more efficient and more productive.

To pay continuous partial attention is to pay partial attention -- CONTINUOUSLY. It is motivated by a desire to be a LIVE node on the network. Another way of saying this is that we want to connect and be connected. We want to effectively scan for opportunity and optimize for the best opportunities, activities, and contacts, in any given moment. To be busy, to be connected, is to be alive, to be recognized, and to matter.

We pay continuous partial attention in an effort NOT TO MISS ANYTHING. It is an always-on, anywhere, anytime, any place behavior that involves an artificial sense of constant crisis. We are always in high alert when we pay continuous partial attention. This artificial sense of constant crisis is more typical of continuous partial attention than it is of multi-tasking.

Via Boing Boing.

Damn I post a lot of stuff from Boing Boing. Maybe y'all should just read that instead of this!

Stardust Shaping Up

2006-07-25T17:46:00.000-07:00

Matthew Vaughn is directing a film based on Neil Gaiman's book Stardust, a moody little fairytale that I recommend you read at your earliest convenience.

Mr. Gaiman recently returned from the UK where he was visiting the set. He posted about taking Charles Vess around the production:

He's somewhere out beyond happy -- like me, he'd been working out all the polite ways of distancing himself from an awful movie, if that's what it had been, and like me he's relieved he won't have to. When Charles is extremely happy he gets sort of quiet and twinkly, and he twinkled a lot yesterday.

And you can't knock the cast, either:

Charlie Cox .... Tristian

Claire Danes .... Yvaine

Robert De Niro .... Captain Shakespeare

Sienna Miller .... Victoria

Michelle Pfeiffer .... Lamia

Jason Flemyng .... Primus

Rupert Everett .... Secondus

Peter O'Toole .... King Of Stormhold

Look for a release date in the US somewhere around March 9, 2007, to be distributed by Paramount.

Via Neil Gaiman's Journal, IMDB, and SciFi Wire.

Kid-Powered Merry-Go-Round Water Pumps

2006-07-25T17:43:00.000-07:00

There was the post on the MAKE: Blog, er, ten days ago, which means it's old news, but it's still pretty darned cool.

You remember those merry-go-round thingies in the playground or park when you were a kid? You put your sibling on there, tell 'em to hold on for dear life, then try your hardest to make them puke? Ok, maybe that was just me.

Anyway, think of all the free energy generated by sibling rivalry that's just being wasted! When there are thirsty kids in Africa! "Wait," says PlayPumps International. "Maybe we can use that..."

And they did!

Via the MAKE: Blog.

WindFire Cursor Kite

2006-07-25T17:34:00.000-07:00

WindFire Designs has made what could quite possibly be the best kite evaar! I wish I could take one with me everywhere! To, you know, point at things!

Via MAKE: Blog and Boing Boing.

Suck it, MPAA

2006-07-25T17:33:00.000-07:00

Meanwhile, in Issue 14.08 (August 2006) of Wired Magazine...

Last November, Shawn Hogan received an unsettling call: A lawyer representing Universal Pictures and the Motion Picture Association of America informed the 30-year-old software developer that they were suing him for downloading Meet the Fockers over BitTorrent. Hogan was baffled. Not only does he deny the accusation, he says he already owned the film on DVD. The attorney said they would settle for $2,500. Hogan declined.

...

Hogan, who coded his way to millions as the CEO of Digital Point Solutions, is determined to change this. Though he expects to incur more than $100,000 in legal fees, he thinks it's a small price to pay to challenge the MPAA's tactics. "They're completely abusing the system," Hogan says. "I would spend well into the millions on this."

Of course, the MPAA isn't backing down either. "I hear Mr. Hogan has said, 'I'm absolutely going to go to trial,' and that is his prerogative," says John G. Malcolm, the MPAA's head of antipiracy. "We look forward to addressing his issues in a court of law." Look for a jury to weigh in by next summer.

"We look forward to addressing his issues?" Man, that John G. Malcolm guy is a dick. I look forward to Mr. Hogan celebrating his legal victory over the MPAA's bullying tactics and pervision of the tort system by teabagging Mr. Malcolm.

Via Boing Boing.

Odd Statuary from Around the World

2006-07-24T16:07:00.000-07:00

Mark Frauenfelder over at Boing Boing posted a link to this gallery of strange statues from all over the world. Take a few minutes to relax and enjoy, won't you?

Via Boing Boing.

Tourist Remover Brings You the World of The Avengers

2006-07-24T14:57:00.000-07:00

You know, Mrs. Peel? Mr. Steed? The Avengers? No, no, the TV series from the sixties. Yeah, with Diana Rigg, that's the one. Yeah, I thought that movie they made in '98 was crap too.

Anyway, in the series, they never had anyone but actors in frame which made it look like there were maybe a dozen people in the entire world. I always thought that was creepy when I was a kid.

Now, thanks to the miracle of modern technology, you can turn all of your vacation spots into Night of the Comet-esque ghost towns! Simply snap several shots from the same angle, upload them all to futureLAB's Tourist Remover and presto! No more tourists, natives, moving cars, pigeons, or any animal life whatsoever mucking up the landscape.

Via Boing Boing.

BTB, Mr. Steed's full name was John Wickham Gascone Berresford Steed. Go forth and bore people with your nerdiness.

Video Game can Help You Relax

2006-07-24T14:31:00.000-07:00

I frequently use video games to relax. Somehow grabbing a NPC by the arm, ripping said arm off of NPC, and then beating the living tar out of said NPC with its own arm is very relaxing, not to mention cathartic.

Simmer Down Sprinter by Steve Lambert is a different kind of video game: no catharsis, but plenty of relaxation for the winner. Here's how Mr. Lambert describes the game:

Simmer Down Sprinter is a two player, sit-down, arcade style video game I designed and programmed in which players compete to move runners around a track. The game is controlled by playerÂs bio-feedback. The more relaxed the player becomes, the faster the runner moves around the track. Essentially it is a game of competitive relaxation.

No arm-ripping-off/sniper-shooting/chainsaw-wielding catharsis, but I'd still like to try it. There's even build notes so you can make your own biofeedback-controlled game. I like Cory Doctorow's implementation concept:

It would be perversely great to do one that's wired to so you win the more stressed-out you become, and attach it to an espresso machine, and a monitor that shows nothing but comments from Slashdot that have been ranked -1 or lower.

I also think it would be great to use the biofeedback to determine how agro the player is, and use that to determine how much damage is dealt to the NPC, ranging from flipping the bird, through ripping off its arm, beating the NPC to death with said arm, jamming the arm up...never mind.

Via Boing Boing.

Ubernerd Mashup: Star Trek vs. Knights of the Round Table

2006-07-24T11:30:00.000-07:00

I think I just peed myself a little.

Via Boing Boing, source of much nerdiness, ~~god~~ FSM love 'em.

All Your Snakes Are Belong to Us

2006-07-24T11:03:00.000-07:00

'Nuff said, really.

Via Boing Boing.

Book: Counting Heads by David Marusek

2006-07-23T20:19:00.000-07:00

Another book I finished lately is Counting Heads by David Marusek, which was named as one of twelve finalists for the John W. Campbell Award.

Counting Heads is chock full of new concepts (as are all my favorite books) and presents a sharp commentary on the post-9/11 world that we've created for ourselves -- you know, the one that sacrifices freedom and the pursuit of happiness on the altar of so-called-security.

Cory Doctorow posted a nice description and review of the book, which I assure you, does not exaggerate:

It's hard to summarize this book because again and again, the plot hinges on wonderful, original inventions, and just describing the storyline would spoil too many of David's delightful surprises. I haven't felt as buffeted by a book since Gibson's Neuromancer -- haven't felt more like I was reading something truly radical, new and exciting.

When David was writing short stories, he was an exciting writer. Now that he's onto novels, he's practically a force of nature.

BTW, while some of the less-than-positive customer reviews on Amazon make some valid points, I think that they may have been looking for a nice, formulaic plot structure (not the hallmark of a good book IMHO) which kept them from seeing the gloriously rich landscape and the fascinating characters inhabiting it.

Via Boing Boing.

Book: Earthcore by Scott Sigler

2006-07-23T19:34:00.000-07:00

I just finished a book called Earthcore by Scott Sigler. Thing I like most about it is its publishing history (not that it's a bad book mind you.) It seems he had a deal with Time Warner to publish the book in 2001, but the deal fell through, so he podcasted it. 10,000 people ended up listening to it, which lead to a deal with Dragon Moon Press. Back at the beginning of June of this year, Mark Frauenfelder over at Boing Boing posted a podcast interview with Mr. Sigler, which I recommend.

I'm very interested in the confluence and influence of authors, blogs, podcasts, ebooks and publishing companies, and this is a great example of how success in one of these mediums can lead to success in others, success being measured by the number of people that get to read your stuff.

Regarding the book itself, it's really not my cup of tea, so when I say I didn't like it, that doesn't mean that you shouldn't read it. I bet you'll like it.

Urwerk is Swiss for Sexy

2006-07-23T19:11:00.000-07:00

If you know anything about me, you know that I have a watch fetish. It's a sad, sad obesession, especially since I can't afford to spend (or bring myself to spend) the kind of money that the really sexy watches go for. I content myself with leaving noseprints and little tiny streaks of drool on the front window of our local ~~wallet draining~~ watch emporium.

Those jerks over at Gizmodo post about the Urwerk UR-103 line of watches. Drooltastic pictures on a kinda crappy site, but note the absence any prices. I know better than to ask. Make sure to take a look at an example of their custom work; I've got to sponge off my keyboard now.

The Electric Car was only Mostly Dead

2006-07-23T18:36:00.000-07:00

Remember when I was whining the other day that I just wanted a little two-seater electric car for commuting? Well, I've found just the thing. Tesla Motors has announced that they're coming out with an electric roadster, which can be described by the following fun facts:

0-60 mph: around four seconds
0-100 mph: under 11 seconds
Top speed: approximately 130-miles per hour (completely silent!)
Range: 200-250 miles per charge (estimated)
Charge time: approximately 3.5 hours

They'll be hitting the streets mid-2007 for somewhere between $80,000 and $120,000. I'll be buying two.

Via AutoblogGreen, Autopia, Engadget, and Gizmodo.

Public Art in Los Angeles

2006-07-23T18:16:00.000-07:00

Boringly formatted but somewhat extensive listing of, public art in Los Angeles, just like the title says. Most of the photos are only so-so, but it still makes for a long list of possible places to visit on a lazy weekend.

Via Art.Blogging.LA.

It's Alive! at the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences

2006-07-21T15:49:00.000-07:00

The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences has an exhibit of animatronic puppets and creatures going on right now through September 10 called It's Alive! Looks pretty darned spiffy, including characters from An American Werewolf in London, Beetlejuice, The Dark Crystal, Ghostbusters, Labyrinth, Little Shop of Horrors, Jurassic Park, Short Circuit, Spider-Man 2, Star Wars and Willow.

Via MAKE: Blog.

Charlie Cox	....	Tristian
Claire Danes	....	Yvaine
Robert De Niro	....	Captain Shakespeare
Sienna Miller	....	Victoria
Michelle Pfeiffer	....	Lamia
Jason Flemyng	....	Primus
Rupert Everett	....	Secondus
Peter O'Toole	....	King Of Stormhold